Office Recap, "New Boss"

Just a quick housekeeping note--I don't think I'm going to have the time to get this week's POP done or write that post about feminism. In short, yay for women! and you should also read The Graveyard Book and watch Bones and listen to Middle Cyclone. Yeah, I think that about covers everything.

Since this was my last episode of The Office before heading off to the Land Of Bryan Adams, I was really, really worried that it was going to be a Teh Lame episode. It was very Teh Cringe-y, but not so much lame. Not very heavy on the lulz, either, but that doesn't mean it wasn't funny. (Admit it, you guys are totally gonna miss my recaps.)

Michael's been with DM for a stunning 15 years, which everyone knows requires a classy party. Dwight suggests that they have an ice sculpture of Michael's head covered in chocolate strawberries. Jim counters a few minutes later with an ice sculpture surrounded by chocolate-covered fruit. Maybe strawberries? This episode is very special something for the ladies, since Jim Halpert spends it in a tux. See, Dwight sent out a memo talking about taking workplace dress more seriously. Jim can't help but comply. He spent 40 minutes getting ready and Pam's just eating it all up.

Idris Elba (Stringer Bell from The Wire, which I only know because everyone mentions that in the same breath as they say his name) arrives as Charles Minor. (Minor? I 'ardly know 'er!) He's the tough-guy boss who's going to establish order and peace once more to Dunder Mifflin Scranton. Poor guy, I don't think he really knew what he was in for. The reception is warm and Michael leads them from the break room to the conference room, where he's prepared bagels in the shape of Cs. And was that lox at the end of the table? It took Michael all night to prepare and it's not long before Charles is messing with Michael's mind. He does everything from disband the PPC (no thanks to Phyllis, pshhh) to tell Kevin that he can't get overtime for fixing an accounting mistake.

Michael turns from adoring to resentful to petulant all in the course of a day, which isn't entirely out of character. Pam has a great talking head about how the immaturity level of his comedy act is in direct correlation to how mad he is. This time he skipped right over Ace Ventura to the "I'm going to repeat everything you say" routine. Ah, yes, the old repetition stand-by. Audiences love that. He tattles to David Wallace, who patiently explains that Charles is his new go-to guy. This is all very confusing for Michael because Jan, his old lover, would only come to Pennsylanvania when she was super horny and Ryan would only drop by to visit his parents and do laundry.

Along with some harmless flirting from Kelly and Angela (well, so far it's harmless), Charles makes the biggest impact in Jim's life. The logistics of Jim's prank don't go over well with Charles and then he argues with Jim over the Assistant (to the) Regional Manager position. Jim quips that "For my next trick, I will now make my career...disappear!" I know they don't get along now, but I think that there may be potential for a BFF relationship in the future. Maybe, I'm not sure yet.

After a failed attempt to reach David on the phone (with a little help from Dwight who charms the receptionist by saying that Michael Scotch has captured Wallace's kid), Michael actually drives up to New York and confronts the CFO. He's always looked up to David and he's not happy with this sudden turn of betrayal. David promises that he'll find the money for Michael's 15th Party and he'll also attend. In a strange turn of events, Michael doesn't accept but instead quits. Dun-dun-dunnnnn.

So I suspected that this was coming based on certain spoilers I've read and it's not like he'll be gone forever. I think it'll be good for Michael to re-interpret his life away from DM. This episode was definitely cringe-worthy and I LOVE it when The Office does the really cringe-y stuff. I had one of those awkward pit-in-my-stomach feelings when he was doing the repeating thing and everyone was yelling at him to stop. It was great and I mean that earnestly. Stuff like that is one of the many reasons I love my show. Man, I'm really gonna miss writing these recaps.

Stay classy, Scranton. I'll see you and the rest of the Dunder Mifflin gang in 18 months.

Office Recap, "Blood Drive"

Gosh, it's so nice to have my Thursday nights filled with meaning once more. TMI? Tonight's episode was all about the Valentine's Day love. "But Gretchen," you say, "Wasn't V-Day three weeks ago?" Yes, dear reader. Yes, it was. But due to weird scheduling things and the so-called digital switch, the higher-ups decided it would be March sweeps instead of February sweeps, which totally threw off my groove.

The cold open has Pam turning down the new phone guy, because those phones would do 95% of her job. She can't even hold the position of "best-candy-putter-outer" because a vending machine could do that. Ah yes, but would they look as cute while doing so? I submit not. Jim jumps to the rescue as Michael Scott (a role he's rather good at--see "Halloween") and they all go into a bizarro Fonzie routine. "What was that?" "That was funny." Yeah...not really.

*theme song*

The huge blood drive van announces that there's a blood drive at the office. You know, just in case you missed out on the title. It is the first Valentine's for Jim and Pam as an engaged couple and the first for Michael without Holly. It's okay, Michael. It's out first without her, too. It's really hard for the office to be around JAM and their general sexiness...so sexy it's hostile. (Did anyone else salute to themselves while saying "General Sexiness"? Just me then? Okay.) This is a very Kevin-centric episode--he's sans Stacey. Actually, it's a rather depressing holiday all around. Kelly's only getting love from her dentist, Oscar is no longer with Gil, Angela doesn't have anyone but her expensive cats, Dwight is getting over Ang, and Andy is off hot-air balloning and couples-massaging in Napa Valley.

 

(via) 

Michael and Kevin can't stand the sight of Jim and Pam being all lovey-dovey, so they ban them from the office and make Pam take her pretty flowers off the desk. Honestly, I didn't think they were being lovey-dovey enough if you catch my drift and I think you do. The DM singles' crew talks about their worst break-ups in the conference room. It's a good moment, albeit very awkward. The most revealing part is that Angela has had two men duel over her...twice. (Their names? John Mark and John David.)

Michael heads down to the blood van to do some donating and I've clearly been watching too much Buffy because I think to myself, "Man, it's a really good thing they're doing this during the day." The blood waitress (loved that) starts to draw blood and the girl around the corner starts to chatter. She's nice, pretty, and giggles at Michael's jokes. Michael gets in a few good cracks about being a juice box of Hawaiin Blood Punch, Type Ooooocean Spray. This is a handy reminder of why people like Michael upon first impression--he has the ability be very funny. Too bad Michael hadn't eaten for three days because he passes out and never gets her name. He does, however, get her glove. (Side note: The first time I gave blood, I got really light-headed when I looked at the bag. His wooziness is a Real Thing.)

The company party gets extended to a full office park mixer. Dwight starts to hit on an Angela-type, only to find out that she uses a lot of paper. (“So where does a woman as charming as yourself find herself employed on a day such as today?") Kevin meets this really sweet lady and almost ruins his chances by talking about Stacey too much. He redeems himself at the last moment and they swap emails. Yay! It's nice to see him win one. Michael plays "Cupid's Sparrow" for a while and tries to hook up Meredith with some guy by talking about her recent hysterectomy. Dude...it's been five years. Get over it.. Glove Girl never shows up, but seeing the office support him through that particular hurdle added a nice emotional component.

Oh yeah...the B-plot involving Jim & Pam and Phyllis & Bob Vance was completely unremarkable. They go out to dinner and tease each other in that half-awkward double date fashion and then Phyllis & Bob Vance disappear right before the food arrives. I liked the banter and the reaction to Phlob's whereabouts, but it wasn't terribly interesting or creative. Also, kind of icky.

 Other bits and pieces I liked...Dwight's hatred of the man who invented seat belts for messing with natural selection and his ability to retract certain body parts into himself. Jim saying that you only get engaged once, present company excluded. Michael's end voice-over about princesses and Cinderella (and by the same token, Kelly clasping her hands to her heart and cheering that Michael's situation was "just like a modern-day Enchanted!"). Oh, and the tag with Creed stealing the blood was awesome.

All around, it was a solid episode, but was it sweeps-worthy? I'm gonna have to say no.

Office (Kinda) Recap, "Lecture Circuit Pt. 2"

Here's the sitch. I missed the first half of the episode because someone needed to be picked up from his job and my parents were gone so they couldn't do it. So when you add that in with the fact that I had a totally lousy day yesterday and I was so exhausted that I couldn't form coherent sentences, I'm phoning in my recap. (Praises be to Hulu so I can watch it later!)

So tell me...what did you think of last night's episode?

Stray Thoughts From The Second Half
-Pam's Forrest Gump impression was adorable
-I'm sure Angela's cat story started out funny, but by the end, it was just weird.
-I love how Dwight's ideal party includes blood and blood pudding.
-"You know what's cooler than the triceratops? Every other dinosaur that ever existed."
-Michael cutting off the sleeve of Holly's cardigan was heart-wrenching. Poor guy.
-Also, they sure as heck better figure out a way to bring back Holly because all of this set-up can't be for nothing.
-I'd have chosen a 1-hour nap, too, Kelly. Or rather, Kelley.
-Loved the callback to Tony the Fat Guy. Michael's memorization technique was fanatastic. (Jabba the Hut, Pizza the Hut, Pepperoni Pizza, Pepperoni Tony, Tony the big fat fatty.)
-If you're in the mood for a full recap, might I recommend the AV Club?

Office Recap, "Lecture Circuit Pt. 1"

Okay, so the next time I throw a birthday party, I'm for sure going to hang up a poster that says, "It is your birthday." Professional, right? Maybe I'll throw in some half-filled brown and gray balloons just for the heck of it.

Lecture Circuit debuts the show's first To Be Continued tag. I have no doubt that they could have condensed this episode into 12 minutes of screen time, but maybe next week is so big that they had no choice. Regardless, I savored the episode because it took things slowly--a welcome change after the chaos of Sunday.

The episode opens with Michael taking advantage of the new phone PA system. In order, he pretended to be Darth Vader, a pilot, a ghost, a school secretary who told Toby Flenderson to go to the principal's office for wetting his bed, and a sports caster. Oh, and he also talked to his doctor about a mole. Mercifully, Jim yanks the cord. You know who's really cute with a PA system? Pam. "Luuuuuke, this is your father. Come set the table for dinner."

*theme song*

The scene opens on a seedy motel (guys, remember the Camelot from Veronica Mars?) and Michael walks out, followed by Pam. In the next room over. It didn't need to be said, but I said it anyway. They just eloped! Or maybe they robbed a bank! Those improv skills just keep coming in handy, don't they, Mike? For reals, Michael has been asked to give a lecture circuit to the other DM branches ('cept Nashua) since Scranton is the best branch. Northeast Pennsylvania represent! He tells the camera that he is going to share his 11 business herbs and spices while Pam loads the car in the background. Lately, we haven't seen many references to the BBC Office and there's this great episode where David Brent gives a motivational speech and makes Dawn carry all his stuff. Pam's going to be his hot roadie in a new cardigan. 72 hours of time-and-a-half? Niiiiice, but it's still not enough to keep you from questioning just why you're spending said time with Michael Scott.

Left in charge of the office are Dwight and Jim, who both also happen to be in charge of party planning. They gave an awesome double talking head and I could barely keep track of what they were saying. They, uh, forget Kelly's birthday which is a BIG mistake, 'cause hell hath no fury like a Kelly scorned. (Side rant: We've seen this before when Kelly falsified there customer surveys. I thought it was going to be Angela's birthday they forgot and that might have been funnier. Also, another birthday-related B-plot? Really? /rant) Yet, it is pretty sad that they forgot Kelly's birthday. She really did look cute and heaven forbid that she actually tell anyone. (Mindy Kaling, the writer of the episode, gave an interview to the Washington Post earlier today. She didn't answer my question, but I still love her anyway.)

So my little brother was incredibly surprised to find out that Rashida Jones is the daughter of Quincy Jones. Speaking of Rashida, "Lecture Circuit" is presumably the last time we'll see Karen Fillipelli. She's moving on to the Amy Poehley-Aziz Ansari-Greg Daniels project, Parks and Recreation. Pam and Michael's first stop is Utica, where Karen reigns as Branch Manager. We first saw the receptionist, Rolando, in "Branch Wars" and he's still a snarky little twerp. Karen's huge preggo stomach enters the room and about five minutes later, Karen herself shows up. It takes Michael a while to work out that the baby cannot possibly be Jim's. Michael then proceedes to lie to the Utica branch, makes Pam pelt them with mini candy bars, and then insults them using mnemonics. (Beardy, Baldy, Mole, Sugar Boobs, Black Woman, and Knocked-up.)

Post-chainsaw ("....And now I'm chopping off Phyllis' head with a chainsaw! Rin-nn-nnn-nnn!" Best. Andy line. EVER.) Karen takes things into her own hands. Did you know that you don't actually pump until the baby's born? Michael didn't. Things are awkward between Pam and Karen until they clear the air. Karen's married to this guy named Dan. We're supposed to think that he's a Jim-type because a) his name is only three letters long and b) he's super tall and goofy. She seems happy for Pam's engagement and then it's all like, "BFF! Let's be pen pals!"

Back to the Kelly birthday, Dwight's in charge of decorations and Jim has to collect money for the party. This is why straight guys don't get put in charge of planning parties. Dwight's decorations look like crap (literally) and all Jim's wrangled up is a three-dollar bill from Creed. I'm interested to see how this all works out.

So Stanley has this pretty new client named Julia and Andy falls hard for her. It was harsh of Phyllis to say that she was out of his league. Harsh and true! Boom. Roasted. Andy car-stalks her music choices and learned she likes Feist. He writes his own lyrics "1 2 3 4" and while it's not as good as Feist's Sesame Street version, it sure won me over. With his resistable charm, Andy convinces Stanley to let her have him as a client in exchange for two of his clients. Taking advice from Creed is never wise, especially when he thinks you're Jim. The Nard Dog's got a case of puppy love and when he goes for the kill, he gets shot down AND loses the account. Rough. (Ruff! Get it?)

In the car ride to Rochester?, Michael muses about how he never really got closure with Holly. I mean, he got a 7-hour car ride and a chance to say goodbye, but never really closure. Sounds like someone's a little unclear on the concept of closure. None of that matters because Pam is totally game to ditch the lecture circuit and visit Nashua instead. My gut tells me that this might not work out well....I'm not listening to my gut because hello, there's a chance Amy Ryan might be involved! I haven't heard anything that confirms her appearence, but seriously, they can't just dangle Holly Flax in front of us and not follow through.

To Be Continued...

Office Recap, "Stress Relief"

Did you hear about the two drums and cymbal that fell off a cliff?
Buh-dum-chhh!

Thank you, I'll be here all week. This Very Special Episode of The Office had the exciting privilege of being an introduction for many viewers. It's an interesting conundrum for the writers because they have to provide enough explanatory behavior for newcomers and still give enough original material for the devoted watchers. I'm pleased to say that this was one of the better episodes in a long while. In fact, it was boss.

Dwight has a tendency to be overly safety-concious and militant, so when his colleagues didn't take his fire safety class seriously, he had no choice but to force them to learn the hard way. Some lighter fluid in a trash can and blocked doors led to total chaos. The scene (which culminated in Stanley having a heart attack) bordered on the level of "utterly zany" which includes other sitcom scenes like Lucy on a chocolate box assembly line. Personally, I didn't laugh that much, but it was a good, albeit non-traditional way to introduce the characters and how they behave. Angela throws her office-cat in the ceiling, Kevin breaks in to the vending machine, etc.

*Theme song plus a modified opening! I hope it sticks around.*

Michael and Dwigh travel all the way up to New York to meet with David Wallace and the DM lawyer. Instead of really listening to their reprimand, the Scranton Boys argue over semantics ("take heeded of?"). In the car, Dwight confesses that he's planning an awesome bomb scare that'll put them all in place. Realistically, Michael knows that what happened with the fire and Stanley was not ideal for an office setting, because an office is not for dying. An office is where dreams come true.

Rose is a certified CPR trainer and she also doesn't know what to do if someone dies. Michael's used the Glengarry Glen Ross "Always Be Closing" line before, as opposed to Airways Breathing Circulation, so that was a good callback. As expected, the CPR training doesn't go as planned. 20 seconds is too long for Kevin and even though Stanley is supposed to be taking it easy in his wheelchair, Michael still forced him to resuscitate the armless, legless dummy. My first truly LOL-moment of the episode was when Rose asked Michael to pump to the tune of "Stayin' Alive" and he busts out with "At first I was afraid, I was petrified..." Andy picks up the slack and Kelly starts to dance--both of those moments were perfectly in-character. Stabbing the dummy is the most sensible thing in Dwight's mind and then he cuts off the face and it's super creepy. I didn't think it was possible for things to fall apart more at this point, but they do.

Seriously? $5300 for one of those CPR dummies? Someone's getting rich off of that industry. Michael attempts to relax the crew in an empty conference using meditation and relaxation techniques. I didn't really laugh a whole lot during this scene and there's a lot left to cover, so I'm gonna move on, mmkay? (Wait, I laughed during "Don't touch his thing! That's what he said. 'Cause of gay." But just then.)

The biggest issue I have with tv events like this is that the networks feel the need to interject random guest stars to gain viewership. And if there's one image I wish I could erase from my brain, it's Jack Black making out with Cloris Leachman shudder Jessica Alba was only on-screen for, like, 4 seconds tops. Lame. The whole pirated-movie idea lacked focus and creativity. The best/worst part of Mrs. Albert Hannaday was the laughably awful soundtrack. Basically, Jim and Pam use Andy to watch movies before they hit the theaters...the punishment fits the crime.Andy sobs at the tale of a love that defies age and he also gets really bummed that he's not as good of a critic as JAM. However, he'd make a great food critic or art critic. This muffin is bad. This painting is bad. Not so difficult, is it?

The best way to feel better about yourself is to get all of your workers together and have them make fun of you, right? Knowing how the roast was going to end didn't make it any less enjoyable to watch. Let's start with the fact that Michael thinks YouTube is produced by someone who's actually named YouTube. Also, he became a boss because that's what people used to call stuff that was totally rad, like shoulder pads or perms. Now it just means "jerk-in-charge."

They gather in the warehouse and Dwight tells them to sign-in, even though the list is technically his statment of regret. ("I state my regret.") The roast kicks off which tiny Miss Angela, who usually doesn't like to make people laugh.
Angela: You know you're Michael Scott if...
Kelly: "Here's a list of people I'd make out with before Michael Scott: A turtle, Kevin, Lord Voldemort. Happy birthday, Michael!"
Meredith: He drives her to drink. Harsh.
Oscar: Something in Spanish. Apparently it means something along the lines of "You give me an ulcer because every day I have to come to work for you. For you!"
Toby: Not allowed, because he's not a friend. I'd have LOVED to see what Toby Flenderson would have to say about Michael at a roast, so I'm kinda sad about that.
Jim: Michael Scott-isms. "Don't cut off your nose to spider face."
Dwight: He gets mad at everyone for insulting Michael and then turns the tables and busts him for having no friends, family, or land.
Pam: Makes fun of his "thing" and then says if it were an iPod, it'd be a shuffle. (Ha!)
Darryl: If they're family, how come Michael doesn't know the name of the other black warehouse guy? (It's Michael, by the way.)
Andy: Sings his own version of "What I Like Hate About You" and it rocks, but I'm automatically partial to All Things Andy.

When Michael gets up to defend himself, he can't handle the surprisingly light insults and trips over the snare drum, effectively becoming his own punchline. I can't wait to re-watch this scene because there were some great jokes and reactions.

The next day opens with a Michael-less office and they're more concerned than usual given the events of the previous day. (Random trivia: I always notice the color of Pam's sweater because it's how I keep track of the different days in the office.) Dwight's TH revels that he's concerned Michael got impaled by a icicle since he always stands right underneath them. What? It's a valid concern. In truth, Michael's actually at the park tossing whole slices of bread at non-existant pigeons who apparently flew west for the winter. His spaceman analogy pretty much lost me, but I don't think it was supposed to make sense.

Comedy writing has never been Michael's strong point (Exhibit A: The Dundies) and yet, his hapless insults are trite and lame that by the end everyone's laughing. For an episode with a high cringe-factor, this scene was a good release of tension for both the characters and the audience. I also resolve to start using the phrase "Boom! Roasted." whenever I insult someone. ("Andy, Cornell called and they think you suck. And you're gayer than Oscar.")

After Pam came back from New York, it seems like the writers have made a conscious effort to have as little Jim and Pam interaction as possible. Okay, I understand that not every single episode can have cutesy moments between the two. I actually prefer it that way. Yet there are still fans out there (*cough*) who used to thrive on looking for any hint of interaction or affection during an episode and I miss that. What's impressive is that even after one and a half seasons of Jim and Pam dating, they still manage to be ridiculously perfect for each other. The JAM conflict in Stress Relief hinged on the fact that Pam's parents were going through a rough patch. Pam's dad stayed with the couple and she even tried to have Jim talk to Mr. Beesly with less-than-successful results. Sounds like they'll be going through a divorce and like most kids of divorces, Pam wonders if her and Jim will make it work. Her anger at Jim dissipates when she learns exactly what Jim told him....about how much he loves Pam and how he knows that she's the right girl for him. If it were anyone else but Jim and Pam, it might come across as cheesy or something, but just knowing what those two have been through makes it deeply sentimential. (Cue collective "squee!" from the fangirls.)

While Jim and Pam are certainly the glue that holds things together, it's easy to forget that Michael Scott is the heart of The Office. His fragile ego and ploys for attention can be grating, but he loves his work so much. It really is a dream come true for him because these people are, in fact, his family. And for all his missteps, they like him back for the most part. Steve Carell's portrayal is so human and flawed that as a viewer, it's hard not to love him as well. And while we might not have as many problems as Michael, I believe that everyone has acted like a Michael at some point in there lives and we can relate to his desire to be loved and admired.

Final Verdict: Great episode that can only get better with a re-watch.  I'm surprised at the number of lukewarm reviews I've come across when the early response was so positive. While it lacked the subtlety of the first season, I loved how it brought each character's relationship to Michael Scott to the forefront, not to mention a particularly sweet moment with Jim and Pam.

Was it the first time for any of you? Did you think it was an adequate introduction to the show? And for long-time fans, how did you feel about it?

Office Recap, "Prince Family Paper"

I think one of my favorite things in the world is when The Office cold-opens with a Jim/Dwight prank. Heaven! This time, Jim found some red wire at a flea market and strung it all through the office and up a telephone poll. Dwight chases it all the way up to the top. He'll be safe, though, 'cause Jim made it up, right?

Michael's on the phone with the C.F.O. (not his initials) David Wallace and he uses a line that I always knew would somehow make it on the show. "Whatchutalkin'bout, Wallace?" he asks, but I pictured him using the reference with Phyllis instead of Willis. Wallace is gonna fax over the details for Michael's latest assignment. It involves espionage, so we know we're in trouble. (And to be entirely honest, I've always felt that fax machines seem extremely outdated.) Anyhoo, "Prince Family Paper" was written by B.J. Novak and awesomely (or sadly) enough, if I hadn't known that beforehand, I still would have been able to tell it was written by him. He writes these awesome throw-away lines and has a way with callbacks.

Putting Michael and Dwight together is a car is a sure-fire formula for greatness. They ponder about what they'll do if they have to seduce the owner's daughter and code names (Michael Scarn!!!) and IHOP or Denny's? IHOP is socialist, so says Dwight. (Seriously, eight bucks for a plate of french toast? Over-freakin-rated.) He'll get pancakes and he'll like them, dangit! The signal to bolt is licking your lips and their rehearsal is somewhat disturbing. They will go in there and be sharks. cue theme from Jaws While scoping out Prince Family Paper, they notice the Princes aren't taking anyone out for a business lunch (valid) and that the clouds mean that it might storm. Michael never could get his cloud types right.

Business is like when the big sharks eat the smaller sharks and it goes down the food chain until the single-cell sharks are being consumed. In the scheme of business operations, Michael's always been something of a tiny shark, so what does he to eat a fellow tiny shark? The Prince Family Paper company is your average mom'n'pop paper store. It's exactly how Michael would run a business if he, y'know, had a family. Mr. Prince serves 80 clients...not too shabby. He also served in Vietnam and lets his grand-daughter do her math homework in the office. As his improv disguise, Michael pretends to be a lawyer. A lawyer who's also a paper genius! Laughter is his job, pain is his game, and law is his profession.

Dwight stumbles into the office exactly ten minutes later inquiring about a job. Mr. Prince's son already works for him, but Dwight's perfectly happy to take his place. He nearly ruins their cover and annihilates Michael during his interview. Michael takes advantage of the situation to take a picture of Mrs. Prince right by their map of clients. Sneakiness is not one of his main traits, which makes it all the more hilarious. One of my favorite scenes of the episode is when Michael helps the little girl with math assigment. "Why is that two so little?" Just times 4 by 2, that's right. Exponentials pretty much suck, so good thing Grandma was there for the save.While pulling out of the parking lot, the bumper falls off of the car annnnnnnd the boys are stuck. Oops.

Our B-plot this week is actually exponentially more hilarious (see what I did there?) than the A-plot even though the A-plot was very good. The office crew decides to settle that age-old debate: Is Hilary Swank hot? For what it's worth, I fall on the Not side of the argument. Great actress, just not attractive or hot or bangable like a painting. The debate is split between Stanley, Creed, Pam, Jim, and Kelly on the Hot side, with Kevin, Andy, Phyllis, Oscar, and Meredith for Not. Once parameters are set ("respect the game!"), they set forth their various sides.

Hilary Swank is a celebrity who we have built up in our minds and she looks like a female Boris Becker. (Who I guess is a semi-attractive tennis player?) On the other hand, she has a symmetrical face and Kevin would make out with her, however, neither of those things add up to hot. Swoon moment! Jim leans down and whispers the scenario about her coming into the office and offering to make out with Kevin. When a man can make that sound sexy to a girl, you know he's mighty talented. Gah. I'm going weak at the knees just thinking about it. Angela almost settles the debate (yes), but then Toby (definitely not) swoops in and ruins everything, AS PER USUAL. Kelly can't handle that Toby doesn't like her, because if Toby doesn't think she's hot then Kelly has no chance, EVER. Well-played, Mr. Novak. It's fun to see the office arguing over something so trivial and it's times like this that you wish you actually worked for Dunder Mifflin.

Also, Kevin has restricted internet access. Hee!

The Prince Family helps Michael patch up his bumber (with duct tape, no less) and brings them coffee. Small displays of affection will always win Michael over and these people literally handed him the list of their largest clients. Heart-breaking, really. Dwight tells him to be the bigger shark and Michael concedes, making a last-minute break for his car. The Cruiser is locked, so he runs back to get his keys and hurries back down to the parking lot. It's not a great chase scene, but what makes it is the instant cut to Wallace praising Michael on the phone for his efforts. For all his flaws, Michael Scott is a good person and this is going to tear him up inside. I sincerely hope they don't drop this plotline because there's room for some very interesting development.

Tag: Michael, walking into his office, notices a picture of Hilary Swank on the wall and casually remarks, "Oh, she's hot." Game, set, and match to Team Hotties!

The next episode will be shown at a special time and date. We got the time-slot following the Super Bowl on February 1st and the ep will run for an hour. This could be a good or bad thing, so I'm feeling rather apprehensive about it all. (Dear Paul Lieberstein, Don't screw the pooch! Hugs, Gretchen.)

Office Recap, "The Duel"

Was the month-long wait worth it? I'd say it was.
Classic cold-open, with the crew of Dunder Mifflin testing out the new speed limit radar. Dwight gets 13 miles per hour, but Michael runs an impossible 31 mph. The new Usain Bolt? Hardly, given that he reached the record with the help of a passing automobile.

*theme song*

Kevin goes for the new candy. Pam tells him to take it slow, since they're hot tamales. All in a rage, Andy enters the office because no one has responded to the wedding RSVP! What an outrage, considering the RSVP date was yesterday! And I'm positive that every one of their co-workers would have replied with their excuse for not attending were it not for the fact that it's been 17 days since the big reveal of Dwight and Angela's affair. Michael thinks that someone needs to tell Andy. Jim reasons he'd find out soon enough since their kids would have giant heads and beet-stained teeth. While discussing it in the breakroom, everyone decides that Angela should be the one to do that. Really, she should. If she didn't do such a whorish job of filling out forms, then we wouldn't even have this problem in the first place. P.S. Oscar, you didn't need to ask to know where they were doing it.

(Obligatory tux shot of the boys during the Golden Globes. No wins for The Office this year, but no hard feelings about it.)

A confession of "I'm not very articulate today" gets Michael in his car with the windows justbarely rolled down. (Michael, what days are you articulate, hmm?) Since we all know the man can't keep a secret to save his life, he accidentally lets slip that Dwight and Angela are sleeping together. And oh, the heartbreak, the confusion, the pacing! I felt so bad for my little Nard Dog. He honestly thought Angela loved him and only him.

Saint Bernard forces the terrible truth from his fiancee. Yeah, she was sleeping with Dwight just "a little bit." Dwight struts out of the kitchen looking for all the world like the volunteer sheriff's deputy he once was. In the back, you can faintly hear a western flute theme and see the tumbleweeds scatter past. Pistols at dawn? Try the parking lot at 4 P.M. High-five!

Routinely, Jim struggles with being the boss. He sticks around and collects all of Dwight's weaponry and really, that's all he can do. (I wonder if he found Mr. A. Knife from the filing cabinet?)

At the NYC office, David Wallace has a few questions for Michael. It's just tense enough to make you nervous because Michael's current track record with DM is on the rocks. Miracle of miracles, Scranton is doing the best of all the branches. You can tell from the expression on David's face that it's just as much of a shock to him as to us. So what's he doing right? "Don't ever do anything to anyone ever...." and he does the rest as an improversation. (Improv + Conversation) Bottom line, Scranton is a good branch because they have fun. It's crazy and dysfunctional, but it works for them. Wallace knows there's something to Michael's technique, but it's not something you can apply to the other branches. The subtle reference to the economy was very nicely done, by the way. (Did you catch how Michael's "need for tweed" joke was in reference to a question about self-assessment?)

Everyone watches from the window as Dwight and Andy have their show-down. Meredith likes having guys fight over her and Kelly knows that you have less options as you get older, so Ang shouldn't feel too special.
A note? What kind of duel is this? The kind where you can get run over by a silent Prius, apparently. Feeling rather foolish about it, Jim intervenes when Andy pulls out his real weapon. You see, Angela has slept with Andy twice. The pain and disbelief written across Dwight's face kind of breaks my heart all over again. Yeah, she was going to marry Andy, but she loved Dwight and that's all he wanted. He felt just as cheated as Andy which says everything about both of their characters. Angela spurned both of them and now neither of them wants her. One sailboat wedding cake is canceled and one personalized bobblehead is thrown in the trash. I get the feeling it's not entirely over yet, but it's nice to get some closure.


Other things we learned from this episode:
Michael won't be fired just yet.
Dwight keeps a cross-bow under that hideous couch in the foyer.
It is possible to have a great episode without much Jim/Pam interaction.
Interspersing introspective moments with great quotes makes for a good scene.
It's Hail Mary time.

Minor Spoiler Alert

Oh, and Amy Ryan is coming back! Maybe for the finale! WOOOOO!

End Spoiler

"You cannot say "I was raped" and expect all of your problems to go away, Kelly. Not again. Don't keep doing that."

Remember when Kelly made mugs for her "America's Got Talent" party and everyone got one except for Dwight and Jim?

You guys, I'm totally a part of the cool club now. The BFF dropped off my Christmas gift last week and I was able to get over the fact that it was late because check this.

I have my very own star mug now! SCORE!

Seriously? Seriously. She got her graphic designer roommate to help with the layout and somehow found a place that makes personalized mugs. (The back of the mug totally has the Dunder Mifflin logo.)

And maybe once twice I've lost count now I've pretended to have my mug and the little Halpert face in my "I <3 Jim" mug make-out. TMI? Oops.

Anyhow, it's the little things like this that make me infinitely grateful that she's my best friend.

Keeping Watch Over Their Flocks

Happy holidays, you guys! I wrapped up my shopping (just figuratively, not literally) last night and I couldn't be more excited that it's Christmas Eve. Christmas Eve is my absolute favorite day of the year because what's more exciting than anticipation? I'll be back next week, but I wanted to wish you all a very wonderful end of the year. Please be safe and enjoy your time with family and friends. In whatever way you celebrate, never forget the spirit of the season.




Linus explains the true meaning of Christmas




An 'Office' Christmas, Charlie Brown-style

Schroeder and Lucy are SO Dwight and Angela.




"Baby, It's Cold Outside" by Will Ferrell and Zooey Deschanel
It wasn't easy to pick just one scene from this movie, but this is in my top three. Also: Buddy jumping the tree to get the star on top and "Thanks, Mr. Narwhal!"


Merry Christmas tomorrow! Happy Hanukkah for the next week! Happy belated Festivus! Have a magnificent Boxing Day, if that's what you're into.

Office Recap, "Moroccan Christmas"

Ahhh, Christmas. A time for singing, giving, wrapping your co-worker's desk in paper, and staging interventions! Wait...what?

Christmases around The Office are rarely normal, but none of them have been quite as out-of -the-ordinary as the Moroccan Christmas. (Sidenote: I'm still mad we didn't get a Christmas episode last year due to the friggin' AMPTP.) The show is usually 50/50 when they have something extremely random happen in the office. Burn your foot on a George Foreman grill? Win! (Sidenote #2: Will somebody please buy me this shirt for Christmas?) Bring in Ben Franklin for a bachelorette party? Fail, in my opinion. Race for a cure for rabies? Win! Have a Moroccan-themed Christmas party just like your grandmother might possibly have? Mostly made of fail. I liked quite a bit about this episode, so it's not gonna be all Debbie Downer.

The party kicks off with vingettes that were reminiscent of the early parties, like Meredith's birthday and the Yankee Swap turned White Elephant. Pam and Jim are flirting at her desk and it's adorable, natch. Michael's serving up drinks despite the no-alcohol rule from corporate that we learned about when Michael got everyone plastered with 15 bottles of vodka. Meredith, as the token alcoholic, is downing drinks left and right. The dancing leads to belly dancing leads to catching her hair on fire. Dwight the Fire Marshall leaps to the rescue with his handy-dandy fire extinguisher--there is a man I want to have around in case of emergencies. (Maybe.)

Back from the commercial break, the men are discussing their schedules. Michael's is problematic because he has a monthly dental appointment for his soft teeth and likes to celebrate Groundhog's Day in private. In true male style, they decide to go for it right then, because it shouldn't take too long, right? Everyone gathers around in the front part of the office, which is still festively decorated in true Moroccan style. The list of "How to tell if you're an alchie" is helpful, with questions like drinking on holidays and if when you drink, you start to question the teachings of the Mormon church.

HAHAHAHA. AWESOME. Okay, I've been waiting for, like, ever for a good Mormon shout-out on the show and they delivered the goods. It's even funnier because my dad pretty much wrote the manual on addiction recovery for the church. (Probably just funny to me.)

Toby tries half-heartedly to stop the intervention, but like most everything else in his life, he fails. Burn! No one has any good examples of how Mer's drinking has affected them, unless you count that time that Kevin scored free movie tickets from her. I, for one, liked the Schrute five-step method of intervention: Awareness, Education, Control, Acceptance and Punching.


Top Three Things Meredith and Amy Winehouse Have In Common
1. Really lousy hair
2. People tried to make them go to rehab, but they said no, no, no.
3. That's it.

My main beef with the episode was the dragging-out of the rehab scene. It wasn't even the kind of uncomfortable-awkward that can be laughed at--it was the kind of pointless-uncomfortable that doesn't belong even in The Office. "I'd like to deposit an alcoholic" made me chuckle, but the rest of the scene felt poorly timed and out-of-character for Michael. Yes, he's needlessly "helpful" at times, but why for Meredith? Wait, I can answer that. His workers are his family and he'll go to any length to do what it takes to aid them. I guess it makes sense, but I still didn't like it.

Maybe the issue I have with the plot is that Meredith has never been a worthy personality of having multiple storylines devoted to her. She's a sex-crazed/boozy single mom which should be enough to make a good character, but it's never worked for me. She's static--exactly the same as she was from day one. And I'm okay with that, as long as they keep her in the background. Yet I can think of at least four episodes where she had a central role. Why are they attemping to flesh out (pun, because she has an affinity for going topless) her character now? I need to mull this over some more.

I'm done with that for now. Let's talk about Dwight. Gaining the upper hand in all aspects of life is important to him, which is why he bought out all of the stores of the hot holiday toy--Princess Unicorn! Her horn can pierce a hole in the sky! It's shiny and vaguely phallic! Dwight's marketing them to local parents for 200 bucks a pop. Way to turn a tidy profit there, dude. Even Darryl gets in on the action, until a desperate Toby buys it for twice the price. Annnnnd Sasha's getting an African-American Barbie for Christmas. Dear Office writers, this was on par with 30 Rock. Make sure you check out every page on the new Princess Unicorn website, found here. "Do not play with Princess Unicorn if you are allergic to lead based paint."

Ever since she caught Dwangela deep in the throes of passion, Phyllis has used that to blackmail-but-not-really Angela into doing her bidding. Well played, Mrs. Vance, well played. From tossing Baby Jesus into the drawer to making Angela double-toast the hummus, it's been quite the reign of terror. Angela, as power-hungry as Dwight, can't take it and claims that Phyllis will never tell. Oh, let's not speak too soon! She spills the secret to everyone BUT Michael, Meredith, and Andy. Oops. Notice the smirk on Dwight's face? This couldn't be more perfect for him.

Andy comes out for a Christmas-themed sitar piece he learned just for his darling. It might be sweet, if it weren't so painful. Clueless as ever, Andy takes Angela home and he wishes them all a good night. Fun fact: Ed Helms is extremely good at learning musical instruments. I bet that in writer's room, they say to themselves, "What can we have Ed pick up this week? I know, the sitar!"

Well, kids, this is the last new episode for A WHOLE MONTH. (weeps quietly to herself) Did you think it was a worthy episode to end on or did it feel like Santa didn't bring you a Princess Unicorn doll?

Endnote: My favorite throwaway moment was Michael nailing Toby in the head with the pen. And here's a testimonial for Princess Unicorn from Gov. Sarah Palin! "Princess Unicorn not only is a wonderful Christmas gift for children but she is also utilitarian as she assists in drilling for oil. Not only does she pierce the sky but she can go through the depths of ice-covered shale."

Office Recap, "Surplus"

Or
How The Office Got Its Groove Back

NBC, if you're going to promote yourself as "Comedy Night Done Right," then you're going to have to crank out more episodes like tonight's The Office and 30 Rock. It also might help if they stop promoting Kath & Kim as their hot new comedy. Seriously, guys, you're not fooling anyone.

Also! I couldn't ever recap 30 Rock because I would just end up quoting the whole thing, so instead...I'm going to cite an uncanny similarity that I have to Liz Lemon from the episode. Trust, there's always one, usually more. This week's confession? Like dear Liz, I would also buy cream soda in bulk. Yum.

But enough about that, let's talk about the awesomeness that was "Surplus." Oscar, the only competent accountant, dumbs it down for Michael, who still recognized it was a surplus yet needed the lemonade stand analogy. The $4300 needed to be spent by the end of the day and I suspect that Oscar was holding out on that little tidbit of information until he'd be most likely to get the copier. The matter is taken to the whole office where an EPIC showdown begins--Oscar in one corner, Pam in the other. Use the chair, Pam! *rimshot*

Toby thinks the money should be put towards air quality control and I never realized how much I missed him until Michael threw back at him, "You're the silent killer!" A barely-audible "You'll see..." made up for the ridiculousness of him coming back.

Jim is firmly in the copier camp, which puts him at odds with his fiancee. I know that in some less-than-intelligent corners of the internet, people were freaking out that this was going to be the end of JAM, along with every other minor conflict. Dear people-who-cannot-comprehend-subtlety: Jim and Pam are going to have a long, blissful life with one another and they will bear many floppy-haired, artsy children. STOP WORRYING ABOUT IT.

I knew none of you were actually concerned about that; I just needed to get it off my chest. Pam's competitive streak has been shown in other storylines, but she was on fire this week. The difference between Pam of "Frame Toby" and the Pam of "Surplus" is that she was dealing with the whole office as opposed to just Michael. She knows how to control him better than any one else. As for convincing Jim, she fluffed up her curls and applied some seriously hot red lipstick. It's a good try, but Jim somehow resists her temptation. I'm sure they have real fights out of the office, but anything we see on camera is just to keep their mundane work semi-interesting.

I was surprised to find that I wasn't very invested in the Dwight-Angela-Andy plot at the beginning of tonight's episode. For going on months, they've dragged it out and I'm not saying that's a bad thing, but my interest has started to dwindle. On the other hand, I'm always in favor of a trip to Schrute Farms. The conditions seem less-than-ideal for a wedding, like how "no slaughtering" must be requested at an additional fee. Andy steps in manure not once, but twice. Is there a term for doing a lame joke once and then repeating it so it seems funnier? I guess I did laugh the second time, so it worked. Dwight has converted one of the barns to be a sweetly romantic setting for the wedding. I'll admit, I can see why Angela gets the American Girl Doll clothes charmed right off of her. In a twist you could see coming from 186 paces away, the German Mennonite Minister weds Dwight and Angela right there and then. It's a confusing time for her anyhow and then Dwight has to go and ruin it all. In an unexpected display of affection, Angela sucks Andy's face off during work, post-tuna sandwich. Ugh.

Bonus: MOSE!
Bigger bonus: Mose squarely hitting Andy in the head with a ball.

There are a number of tactics used in the final surplus decision, such as letting Hank the Security Guard decide to everyone suddenly showering Michael with the affection he so often craves and never receives. Choking down his tiramisu, Michael learns that he can get 15% of the ending amount. $645 can buy a lot of coats or one awesome fur coat. Instead, in a rare display of workplace ingenuity, Michael lets Oscar and Pam duke it out. That would have been fun to see, but we as the viewers only get the end result--chairs win! The show excels when it takes small plots and expands them to the main plots, which is what made the halcyon days of Seasons One and Two so wonderful.

How great was that tag scene with Jim and Pam? Making copies has never seemed sexier. Congratulations to John Krasinski for Sundance selecting his film, Brief Interviews with Hideous Men, to be shown at the festival. And more importantly, congratulations to me for living in the state that hosts Sundance, so you better plan on some hardcore celebrity-stalking going on that week. I'll probably call it Operation:JKras.

Last thing--I have to know, would you have sided with Oscar or Pam? I would have wanted new chairs.

Office Recap, "Frame Toby"

Maybe I was just in a mood because ABC canceled Pushing Daisies, but both 30 Rock and The Office were lackluster tonight. Actually, no. Even without ABC's huge mistake, they were laaaaaaame. There, I said it.

Basically, Michael is shocked, SHOCKED to find out that Toby is back in the office even though he's been there for a week. David Wallace calls Mike back after his urgent text---911 CALL ME--which is always effective. They can't fire Toby, unless he physically hurts or sexually harasses someone. Dwight's been taking lessons from The Shield and they decide to frame Toby. Sure, it's illegal, but it's also Toby. Worth it! An unwilling Pam and a disturbingly willing Dwight don't help out much in the sexual harassment department and Michael can't convince Toby to hit him. Mike scores some weed from the Vance Refrigeration guy, which actually makes sense because they're the ones that left the joint in the parking lot in "Drug Testing." Leaving a baggie filled with Caprese Salad in someone's desk is not a crime, so Michael gets off the hook.

B-story! Someone left a mess in the microwave and Pam is not going to be the one to clean it up. Really, Pam? A passive-aggressive note? I once had a roommate leave a note for our apartment that insisted that we would not be able to find husbands if we didn't learn to clean up after ourselves AND she meant every word. Yeah, I don't miss that. There's no resolution to the storyline, although the first deleted scene does elaborate on the sitch.

Elsewhere in the office...
-Creed really shouldn't be around cops. Ever.
-Jim did end up buying his parents' house for him and Pam. It's terribly romantic, leading to a perfect moment of "I love the house, Jim." Aw, huggy hugs!
-More importantly, we got a great glimpse of Jim's arms when he was trying to remove the creepy-a clown painting.
-Ryan is going to Thailand with some high school students. I'm gonna miss that guy, even if he'd just make the microwave mess worse.
-The Vance Refrigeration boys are played by Lee Eisenberg and Gene Stupnitsky, two of the show's best writers.
-Dwight's ideal crime is eerily similar to his perfect date. This is my favorite deleted scene of all the deleted scenes.



There were some very funny parts, but as a whole, the episode didn't mesh for me. The plot lines had potential, but simply were not carried out especially well. The episode was written by Mindy Kaling, my future bff, but her past few episodes haven't been up to snuff. She wrote some of the best Season Two eps, like "The Dundies," "The Injury," and "Take Your Daughter To Work Day," but then she wrote "Benjamin Franklin" and "Frame Toby." She is incredibly talented and I just hope that she remembers to pack her a-game next time around, because she keeps forgetting it at home. Oh snap!

I think the biggest part of why I didn't like this one is because I feel the same way about Toby that Michael does. Seriously, why is he the way that he is? I hate so much about what he chooses to be. Perv ball. Convicted rapist. That guy needs to stick a letter opener in his skull. Also, I feel like the Michael-Toby storyline has been worn thin. Couldn't he get another job elsewhere? Why would he choose to come back to Dunder Mifflin Scranton? I realize Holly barely just left, but I think we need a new character.

Please tell me I'm not alone in my assessment. Or was there some redeeming factor I didn't catch?

Office Recap, "Business Trip"

Back in Scranton and it feels so good! More on that later, though.
First, a few tips from advice about international business customs.
In Japan, if you humiliate yourself, you must commit suicide. If you're Meredith in Abu Dabi, you should cover your face with a coat. (Her "Helloooo!" absolutely killed me.) If you ever go to Italy, remember that it's polite to wash your hands after you go to the bathroom.
But what about when you're in Canada, eh hoser? Okay, I'll leave the Canada jokes to How I Met Your Mother.

Jim's got a spring in his step and a song in his heart. Pam returns in 6.5 days! Everyone seems to be more involved with the relationship than ever before and it's a little disconcerting. Especially Creed's shoulder rub and Stanley's "Heh heh." shudder

And then it all falls apart. With a waver in her voice, Pam calls Jim because she's failing her supposedly 12-week program. Didn't she go in June? Yeah, it's now mid-November, but the writers seemed to have overlooked that. Anyhow, the professors switched to Acrobat when she was just getting the hang of Quark and she has to re-take the program. Jim's a good sport about it, but you can tell he's crushed. Pam can barely hold in her tears so she fakes that her battery is dying. Raise your hand if you've been there!

Ever since Holly got transferred, Michael's been feeling a little down. David Wallace decides to send him to Winnipeg for a sales call as some sort of weird consolation. This episode brings together the combination of Michael, Andy, and Oscar, which I don't believe we've ever seen before. Andy comes because of his Ivy League French classes and Oscar tags along for the numbers. It's a short trip up to Canada, but Andy and Oscar are prepared with a personal dvd player (where would we be without those for vacations?) and egg salad sandwiches. I agree with Michael--gross. "Do you also have a bag of baby poop?" It disturbed me that Michael referred to his sleep mask as a blindfold. Jan Levinson really took a toll on this guy.

They are staying in some fancy schmancy hotel with a concierge. Ooh la la! Marie is the name of the Canadian Geisha and if my sources are correct, she was also in Reno 911. Later that night, the boys practically stalk her at her after-work joint, where Michael grills her about holiday dry cleaning. Oddly enough, this works for Marie and they make out. That is good for Michael, who needs a rebound. Remember his last rebound, the Japanese waitresses that he couldn't tell apart? Good times...

We've seen a number of the Office characters when they're soundly soused, but Drunk Andy and Drunk Oscar take home the Dundie for being the funniest drunks. Oscar can't see what Andy sees in Angela. Underneath that ice queen exterior, there's a tiny bit of jelly. If that weren't such a weird description, it'd actually be sweet. Since I've never been drunk, I can't explain the logic behind calling your exes or significant others, but Oscar convinces Andy to give Ang a ring and I do mean on the phone, Santa Baby. What I like about Oscar is that he cuts straight to the chase. "Why won't you do Andy?" Andy says they will discuss it later...naked. Maybe it was completely inappropriate, but I laughed hardest at that scene more than any of the other scenes this season.

Andy and Oscar come to an understanding the next morning. The phone call, by the way, was totally not a dream. Poor guy--he's now back to first base. Oscar gets that it's different with his fellow accountant, so he asks what constitutes first base with Angela. A kiss on the forehead, which begs the question of what the other bases are. Try not to think about it too much. Also, how adorable is Ed Helms? Wikipedia tells me that he's still single and an accomplished banjoist. Seriously, I would date him in real life. Call me, Ed!

In the category of "still funny but losing my interest unless they keep eating each other's faces" are Ryan and Kelly. Now that they're both sequestered back in the annex once more, how can Kelly resist? As it turns out, she can't resist the push-ups and Ryan's still got a thing for a little junk in the trunk. Ryan composes a very well-written text message to Darryl for Kelly and they push "send" together. Those two are precious, aren't they? It's all cool with Darryl, who proceeds to strut out to his truck. Ryan is slowly beginning to fall back to his old ways/lack of enthusiasm and Kelly couldn't be happier! These situations are sad when it happens to your friends, but kind of awesome in tv land.

Since he really is a great salesman, Michael lands a two-year sale with the Canadian clients. He's dissatified with David Wallace, however, and spills out all of his anger about the Holly situation. It really was a sucky thing to do. Or, if you're Jennifer Aniston, it was very uncool of Angelina David Wallace to do that.

In Office lore, the parking lot has special meaning and not just because Pam portrayed it incorrectly in her painting. No, the parking lot has been the home of confessions, broken dreams, and failed proposals. So when Jim walks out and sees Ms. Beesly waiting for him, it is almost enough to make up for all the heartache. (Almost.) Regardless, the scene is perfect. The background is bathed in light--a stark contrast from the darkness of the other scenes. Pam explains that she doesn't even like graphic design and that she missed Scranton and that she didn't come back solely for Jim. Jim walks straight to her with a ridiculously happy grin on his face and he kisses his newly returned petit fiancee. Everyone, say it with me. Squee!


Oh, and Dwight would like those five copies first thing in the morning.

Office Recap, "Customer Survey"

I don't know about you guys, but I always respond to break-ups by telling my friends and family that I'm engaged. The office buys the story, heck, Kelly even buys a bridesmaid dress (white, a callback to Phyllis' Wedding) but Michael's mom isn't so sure. Psych! Holly Flax, we knew ye well.

Kelly Kapoor is in charge of customer service for Dunder Mifflin. She loves people because she assumes that people love her, which makes her perfect for the job. (Sidebar: She's played by Mindy Kaling,  who is one of my favorite writers on the show. Mindy has a new short series on Strike TV called House Poor and it's so funny.) She conducts the surveys for the salespeople, which determines their bonuses. This is a lot of responsibility for a girl who once listed "Beyonce, pink the color, Pink the person, hot dogs, basically anything that's awesome" as her favorite things and whose favorite drink is a seven and seven with eight maraschino cherries, sugar on the rim, blended if you can. (Honestly, I mentioned those because I happened to have her favorite things and drink memorized and I wanted to show off. Impressive, right?)

I'm gonna go out on a limb here and admit that Jim/Dwight is my favorite relationship on The Office. Yes, even more than Jim and Pam. I can't really explain it, but it is. There's something about the competition and extreme differences in personality and the gradual understanding that I can't ever get enough of. Since both Dwight and Jim received horrendous customer reviews, they have to form an alliance to figure out what's behind it. We know they're both superb salesmen, but the reviews aren't entirely wrong. Dwight is highly abrasive with people that he thinks less of. While Jim isn't really arrogant, it is reasonable for other people to view him as "smudge."

Dwight thinks that it might be the mob or NASA or Kelly or money laundering. (There may be some evidence of the last.) Putting his detective skills to the test, Jim pieces together that Dwight was actually correct. Kelly, indeed! Andy nearly flipped his lid when Jim used his personalized coffee cup. Talking to Ryan (who's still a gigantic jerk), Jim realizes that he missed Kelly's America's Got Talent party a few months ago. In a sequence of awesome camera shots, it is revealed that everyone in the office has a personalized mug except for him and Dwight. Eureka!

 (Buy the set of ten mugs at The Office Store.)

Dwight wants swift retribution ("Let's get her!"), but Michael prefers to deal with Kelly alone. The scene that followed was so amazing. Kelly only partially confesses and then tries to get out of it by saying that she was raped. Michael is all, "You can't use that excuse. Not again." and explains that he understands when people don't come to parties because then you're left eating tons of leftover guacamole by yourself. He tries to get her to produce fake tears. It's almost convincing until Kelly collapses into giggles and Michael joins her. It was absurd and dark and sweet all at once.

In what had to have been the most Jim and Pam interaction since the premiere, Pam found the world's tiniest bluetooth phones in the village. I just want one because they're cute. I can't remember the official name--you'll have to ask Dwight. They use them for their eight-hour personal calls. It might come across as annoying/ridiculous, but Jim and Pam of course kick every other couple's trash when it comes to cute gestures. Jim knows exactly what Pam likes in her coffee and Pam knows to ask what color of mustard Dwight's shirt is. The phone situation set them up for a ton of jokes also, like Pam's response to Kelly's "Dwight, get out of my nook!"

Meanwhile, back at the Dwandela ranch, Andy's found the perfect tentist for their wedding. It's two stories, gray, and heated, so nothing too elaborate. Angela agrees on one condition--it has to be in a hand-plowed field within a 5-8 miles radius. Also, a farm house that has slats in the roof and antique tools when you rollover would be nice. Schrute Farms to the rescue! This is when it hit me that Angie has no qualms about marrying Andy and continuing on with Dwight. I love Dwight and Angela, but they deserve better than their current arrangement.

Mad Men's Rich Sommer made his second appearance as Pam's classmate Alex. He invites her to an art show and then asks for a moment alone. Jim, thankfully, is still on the line. Alex explains that if Pam really wants to be an artist, she needs to stay in New York. And it's pretty bluntly implied that he's totally into her. You have to trust me when I say that he is no threat to Jim and Pam. His words about her future hit close to home. Combined with last week's "prank," this will be the catalyst for Jim and Pam to decide exactly what they want from their respective careers, as well as their future together. I don't love the way that the writers set it up, but not only is it necessary, I think it will be really good for our beloved couple.

Geez, what a jam-packed episode. (Pun.) I didn't even talk about the Bill Buttlicker scene or Jim buying his parent's house or the Excaliber Package! Kids, this is how you do November Sweeps.

Office Recap, "Employee Transfer"

Happy Halloween, everybody! The Office celebrated in style. I love how Dunder Mifflin Scranton actually dresses up for the occasion. We had Kelly as Carrie Bradshaw, Ryan as the Geico Gecko (or Gordon Gekko, which conclusively proves the latest Stuff White People Like post), Meredith as a cheerleader (probably a slutty one), Oscar as Uncle Sam, Jim as Dave, and Kevin, Dwight, and Creed as The Joker. Creed was almost too accurate for comfort in that costume. Pam made an adorable Charlie Chaplin/Hitler all alone at corporate.

(via NBC.com) Just a couple of kitties, out on the town!

David Wallace let the cat (and by cat, I mean kitten) out of the bag on Holly and Michael, so H-dawg got transferred back to Nashua. I hate to say that not discussing the issue was classic Michael, because I feel like I overuse that phrase, but come on. It was classic Michael! Holly and Michael practiced their cute voices again in the truck, 'cept Michael's trucker voice sounded like it was from The Dukes of Hazzard. I'm not sure why Darryl agreed to be in a vehicle with Michael for seven hours, but whatevs.

The thing about long car trips is that they're fun in theory. The first hour rocks, but after that you begin to realize that your butt hurts and the scenery hasn't changed and the only radio stations with decent reception are country. Michael's ability to carry on a conversation and nap is astounding. The magnitude of a long-distance relationship with Michael hits Holly hard and they begin to hash it out somewhere around the halfway point, where there are no beds & breakfasts...emphasis on both. Life is a highway, but for Darryl, hell can be a highway, too. While Holly and Michael are so perfect for each other, the timing and location just wasn't right and sometimes that's all it takes. Curse you Amy Ryan for being such a talent and in demand actress!

Remember what I said last week about Dwight using his instincts to get Angela back? This week he began the attack to chip away at the fragile, preppy shell of Andy Bernard. What better way to do so than to mock the best Ivy League school out there? Dwight has this ability to fully research any topic and carry out a plan in exact detail. Andy receives "permission" to interview Dwight, which was the perfect opportunity to get back at his nemesis. (During "The Job," Dwight gave an interview to Andy for the Assistant (to the) Regional Manager position.) Dwight quickly turns the tables on Mr. Bernard and the interviewer becomes the interviewee! Brilliant. Of the three plot lines, I thought this one did the best job of mixing the funny with the character relationships.

Part of me was glad to see Jim and Pam interacting again, but the other part of me was sad that it had to be in such a lame situation. I'd always pictured Jim's family as being incredibly nice and funny. Sadly, his brothers were neither. Pam's prank wasn't that great when I first heard her describe it, but it after her elaboration at the end, it sounded pretty complex. Anything would have been better than the hot mess of a lunch with the Halpert boys. They decided to tease her about being an art major, because Jim hates it when they tease his girlfriends. Something like that would have been over-the-line in real life and while The Office can usually get away with that kind of stuff, their brotherly razzing was laaaaaaaame. TVGuide.com had this to say about the sitch. "The prank wasn't on Jim - it was on Pam. They wanted to see if she can take it and hang with the Halperts." That makes sense in a roundabout sort of way, but I thought the execution was poorly done. Pam talking about being the "absolute best" and planning to prank Tom for male patten baldness were both really cute.

I laughed lots during the first half, but the second half was very meh. What'd you guys think? Do you bet that Holly will ever come back? Will Michael go back to Jan? Will Kevin ever recover from waking up at 4 am to become the worst interpretation of The Joker ever?

Office Recap, "Crime Aid"

What is Crime Aid, exactly? Crime Reduces Innocence. Makes Everyone Angry, I Declare.

This episode did wonders in keeping the story line moving along, but also offered plenty of laughs. My notes are chockful of awesome moments and lines and I just hope I can get to it all. Yeah, I take notes. So what?

It only makes sense to start with the most important part. Was that not the greatest "That's What She Said!" line during the auction? Everything else is secondary.

The cold open shows Pam at corporate, though it's unclear what she actually does. She's already getting room and board comped because of her RA status, but New York is expensive, y'all! Go figure. Oh yeah, and maybe because her new friends are staying out until eight in the morning. I like the fact that Pam is making new friends and getting a wild college life. She's never really been out of her Philly Scranton comfort zone and I think it's good for her. I have so missed the Michael and Pam interaction. My dad would sing the Ricola jingle ALL THE TIME when I was younger, so I get that it's annoying. Really, really, really annoying.

Andy and Ang have set the date for Thanksgiving Day (!) 2009. They're going to live in Disney Celebration Village and breed half-stern/half-a capella babies together. Okay, raise your hand if you considered just how much fun it would be to live right by Disney World? Me too. Even though they're completely wrong for each other, Phyllis makes a good point. Andy's safe. I still think Dwight has the edge, though. He's a hunter and those instincts are going to serve him well. There's a difference between a man who can scream well and a man who can whittle a knife with a knife.

(How amazingly pretentious is Andy's middle name?)

Phyllis, who stumbled upon the Dwangela love nest last season, proves to be a good source of comfort to D-Money. "We deserve to be with someone who wants to be with us." Oh, Phyllis, I can't even begin to say how true this is. Even though Dwight slashed her tire, he realizes that Phyllis wasn't using her knowledge for evil, but for good. The great part about the documentary format is the use of unseen comedy. How I Met Your Mother excels at flashbacks, but I had an even better time imagining the conversations when Angela taught Dwight about sheets, monotheism, and preventive medicine.

Michael and Holly continue to own my heart. The tally is at two dates and once they make plans for that evening, they play the "Tonight's no good, because I am busy taking you out" game. Michael awkwardly interjects a question if they'll be doing grown-up stuff (hey, this is a family blog, remember?) that night and Holly thinks they will. Ooh-la-la! I loved Holly's initiative in getting Michael back into the building for a little makey-outy time. These are my notes for that scene: Cute voices! Hand holding! After vous! Squee! Yes, folks, this is the stuff my recaps are made of. I sincerely hope they went elsewhere for the rest of the night.

In their excitement, neither of them remembered to lock the door. Ohhhh snap, because now Oscar is missing a laptop and Kevin is missing his surge protector. I hate it when I'm prone to surges too, Kevin. Holly and Michael (those two really need a good portmanteau) feel genuinely bad about their mistake, but are also genuinely in like with each other. (Twice.) Michael concocts a brilliant plan to auction off employee services and Bruce Springsteen tickets. The boss scored The Boss!

The auction takes up the second half of the episode, but it never draws the focus away from the character relationships. Michael has obviously never been to an auction and the gavel squeaks when you bang it. I love how the crowd is 90% Dunder Mifflin. No one wants $300 yoga lessons or Hank the Security Guard's bad cd or an all-inclusive Creed or Kevin's tax services. I can't really blame them on the latter, because numbers aren't Kevin's strength. David Wallace, the intrepid C.F.O., shows up with a weekend at Martha's Vineyard, which is very decent of him. Michael's Springsteen tickets got "stolen" by the thief, so that's a no-go. Wait, but what about Phyllis' hug? An all-out bidding war starts--it accelerates to one thousand dollars from her husband. (Bob Vance, Vance Refrigeration.) To Phyllis: That better be some hug, if you know what I'm sayin'.

Real quick about Jim: Drinks with the guys leads to a visit from Roy leads to a conversation about Pam leads to a jealous Jim driving to New York to check up on Pam. He has reason to be slightly insecure, even though that isn't enough of an excuse to be over-protective/untrusting. The glory of Jim and Pam is that he is not that guy and they are not that couple, so he turns around right before the exit.

As much as I loved seeing Michael and Holly kiss in front of the auction board, I did not like David Wallace's Talking Head about how he wasn't aware they were dating. This is bad news bears, guys! I guess some things in life really are too good to be true.

Bonus Darryl moment: "Michael gave me a list of his top ten Bruce Springsteen songs. Three were Huey Lewis and the News, one was Tracy Chapman's 'Fast Car,' and there was my personal favorite, 'Short People.'"

PoP, Edition 5

First, I'd like to answer the questions I posed a few posts ago about blogging and reading habits. My reading habits are always crazy in flux and blogging has had an impact on that. I've read a wider variety of books and I've noticed a definite increase in the amount of non-fiction that I've read. I attribute that to the fact that blogging is a non-fiction writing medium. I read less than I did in high school, but more than I did in college. Most of it happens on the weekends, unless I happen to have a 30 Rock marathon or something.

Books
The Adoration of Jenna Fox, by Mary E. Pearson
Jenna wakes up after being in a coma for a year with no memories of her past. Slowly, she pieces together the details of her life-changing accident and how it impacts her future. Reading this book made me ponder so many things about the nature of life and ethics. The medical elements were sci-fi, but the emotion from Jenna is applicable to any teenage girl. Her progression in life and relationships and social settings is masterful. I loved how the book started out with short, staccato sentences and slowly evolved into longer, more thought-provoking passages. Word on the street is that it was optioned for a movie, but I don't see how anything can compare to the book.

Wow, that was it for this week. (Remember what I said about a 30 Rock marathon? Yeah.)

Music
Perfect Symmetry, by Keane
Listen, I love Keane. Hopes and Fears was way too good for a debut album. Under The Iron Sea? Not as good, but still dang great. Perfect Symmetry is the weakest of the three. It has its good moments, to be sure, but I can't get behind the fake 80s-ness and lack of pure piano pop. "You Haven't Told Me Anything" sounds exactly like The Killers' "Somebody Told Me." Been there, done that. Also disappointing: The cover art is not perfectly symmetrical. (On a happier note, have you heard their cover/mash-up called Dirrtylicious? It's amazing.)

Alright, Still, by Lily Allen
It's disconcerting to really listen to the lyrics of Lily Allen's songs, because you're all, "Wait, is this twee-voiced, British-accented, darling girl actually saying those things?" (Much like Sarah Silverman, except Sarah's Jewish.) This is a totally kick-awesome album, all sunny riffs and girl power and purpose. She's everything The Spice Girls wished they could be.

Movies
Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist
 Remember how I had mixed feelings about the book? I liked the book better than the movie. Michael Cera and Kat Dennings were perfect to play Nick and Norah, but I hated the liberties the movie took with the story. The novel had more direction and did a better job at portraying the complicated difference between teenage lust and love. Okay, this is making is sound like I hated the movie. I didn't hate it, I just didn't love it like I thought I would. I was sad to realize I'm not hip enough to relate to the characters anymore, but I am still hip enough to like and recognize the music.

City of Ember
Yet another movie based off a young adult book...yay for themes! City of Ember is the exact opposite of Nick and Norah, as I loved the book and I loved the movie. Saoirse Ronan, who has to have one of the most unpronounceable names in show biz, is sprightly and hopeful as Lena Mayfleet.  Harry Treadaway, as Doon Harroway, is the right amount of brooding and determined. Also, he's going to be insanely hot when he grows up. Just sayin'... (Edit: JB pointed out that he's actually 24. I feel better about liking him now.) Bill Murray's character is paunchy and smarmy, which doesn't make his character much different from his real-life self. It's a sweet kid's movie that also has that ability to charm adults. The book does a better job with showing the intracacies of the society, but otherwise it was a wonderful adaption. I don't get to say that enough about movies made from books.

Television
30 Rock, Season One
I was devoted to Tina Fey long before 30 Rock, but this show cemented my love. This is the funniest show on tv today and you all know how I feel about The Office. 30 Rock has that elusive whip-smart quality that is lacking on so many shows. Every week, the social commentary and political jokes are nailed. The best part is that it will still be funny in ten years and fifty years. The knowledge that I'm a young Liz Lemon is both horrifying and thrilling. I've also picked up mannerisms and catchphrases from her, such as Blerg! By the hammer of Thor! Everything is the worst! The dialogue is polished and much of the throwaway humor is only caught upon the second or third viewing. The attention to detail on the show is absolutely stunning. Like Dwight said to the man who didn't watch Battlestar Galatica, if you're not watching this, then you're an idiot. (Warning: This probably isn't the last I'll talk about it before the premiere next week.)

Office Recap, "Baby Shower"

Did we really only have to wait a week between episodes? That hasn't happened in, like, months! I usually have a class on Thursdays, so I tape the show on our VCR, 'cause we're ghetto like that. We don't even have a remote to the VCR, so if I want to fast-forward through the commercials, I have to get up and press the button. I can't wait to tell my kids about all the hardships I had to endure.

Where in the name of Anne Geddes did they procure so many fake vegetables? (via NBC)

You know what the sign of a true friend is? One who will fake-birth a watermelon so you can practice for the delivery of your ex-girlfriend's sperm donor baby. Michael attracts some insane friends, that much is for certain. Andy, ever eager to play the third wheel, jumps in to help but it ultimately shunned. I loved how Dwight drank out of the cup after his "water" "broke." In other weird food news, they also ate the birthing watermelon, which I imagine is probably more refreshing than placenta.

Jim and Pam are actually the least interesting of the plot lines for once.Conflicting schedules and new friends spell "Trouble" with a capital T which rhymes with fake angst. It's typical LDR stuff. Missed calls lead to nearly identical voice mails which proves they're totally in sync. Of course they are! It's Jim and Pam. (The Carpet featured a similar squee-worthy voice mail scene.) When do we get Pam back in the office?

Remember when Jan was just a high-strung corporate leader? I miss her. A lot. Crazy Jan should have been written off the show when she collapsed in on herself "like a dying star." That's what dying stars do. They go away. Anyhow, she got herself knocked up and bam! now she has a kid. A darling little girl named Astird. Or Astrid. Astird is funnier. She wisely choose not to call Michael at the time of delivery, because Michael should not be allowed in places with expensive equipment and tiny people. He's heartbroken and unsure about this new baby. Michael did have the sense to tell Holly beforehand that he would be treating her (and Ryan--ha!) poorly because she's all skinny and hot and Jan's not. Except Jan is hot again and Michael still treats her like she smells like old tomatoes and dirt. Also, can we not have Jan sing again? Ever? Kthx.

In one brief interaction with Holly, Jan is immediately able to sense that this is the kind of girl that could take Michael away. And in Holly's defense, her retort about the baby answering phones was very funny. Jan warns Michael that he can't date Holly (chillax, woman!) and in a rare moment of defiance, Michael goes and does just the opposite. He wraps Ms. Flax up in a tight hug and asks her out. Atta boy! It was like a sweeter, more innocent version of Casino Night. Maybe he's starting to finally see that he doesn't need the constant approval from those who are more successful. Ah, who are we kidding? I don't think Michael will ever grow out of that, but there was still a minuscule amount of character growth. With Michael, I'll take whatever progress I can get.

Dwight heroically tests out Jan's $1200 stroller for little Astrid.(Astird. Heh. Still laughing about this.) I'm pretty sure the makers don't even stress-test their product this much, but that's Dwight for you. He also pretends that there is a real baby inside and reacts accordingly. "Oh no, my child!" Goofy, but it's a good foil to the more complex Michael storyline.

Three throwaway moments that I really liked:

1. Dwight circumcised himself. Ha. (I'm so immature sometimes. Astird.)

2. Stanley suffers from some of the same symptoms as pregnant women, but he doesn't get any sympathy for it.

3. Darryl! There has never been a bad scene with Michael and Darryl in the history of The Office. 

Bonus: The montage with Michael and the babies was so cute. He'll make a great dad someday. Preferably to Holly's babies. Who biologically belong to him. Hey, a girl can dream, right?

Office Recap, "Business Ethics"

The Office x tension between Michael and Holly + Jim pranking Dwight - Pam = One episode that I have pretty mixed feelings about.

"Business Ethics" revolved around the plot that Holly was to give her first conference meeting. Conference meetings have to be memorable, funny, and full of twists and turns. (Like a Robin Williams/M. Night Shyamalan flick) So hey, no pressure there, Holly.

Michael, of course, intervenes and somehow convinces everyone to begin spilling their indiscretions. Okay, if Michael Scott tells you that you have immunity, you shouldn't really believe him. That's just a good rule of thumb, mmkay, Dunder Mifflinites? The little things become to come out, like taking long lunch breaks or pirating music or watching YouTube videos in your office for five days straight. All of a sudden, Meredith busts out that she's been doing things with the Hammermill Rep in exchange for paper discounts and Outback Steakhouse gift certificates. I KNOW. Holly freaks out and Michael tries to play it off as completely innocent.

Mike-raculous and Holly-lujah talk it out over lunch at the famed Cooper's. Maybe it's only famous on the show, but I was still excited to see it. Holly can be silly, but she's also much more professional. Incidentally, this is precisely why Michael needs her in his life. I hated watching them argue--it was very reminiscent of "Boys and Girls" when Jim and Pam were fighting about the graphic design program.

We all know Michael thinks of the office as his family, as he doesn't really have anyone else. Holly quickly points out that "it's not a family, it's a workplace." Oooooh. Ouch. Steve Carell is so wonderful at grasping onto those fleeting emotions of pain and confusion. She's demoted from his true love to HR Rep and he treats her just like Toby.

Back in the other corner of the office, Jim is tracking all of Dwight's non-work activities, thus wasting his entire day. Dwight's gullibility and love for the rules sets up a prank that's not elaborate, but it is effective. (Oh, and real quick. Jim and Pam announce their engagement to a weird mix of apathy, anger, and unbridled enthusiasm. Jenna Fischer was sick for a few days, so that's probably why she was absent.) Jim hits all of Dwight's weak spots, like BSG, Harry Potter, LOTR, and Star Wars. As a fellow geek, I got way too much pleasure out of that scene. There is no way I could have held my tongue to the tune of "It's about a guy named Dumbledore Calrissian, and he needs to return the ring back to Mordor." (Somebody please write a fan fic about this, kthx.) If you'll remember from the last episode, Dwight is stealing company time on a regular basis with one engaged accountant. This is why we need Pam around, because she would have picked up on that in no time.

Kendall, the HR guy from corporate, takes a brief conference call with he not only approves but encourages Meredith's behavior. Times are tough in the paper industry, y'know? Holly is aghast, but still gets to finish her presentation anyway. What I liked most about this episode was that it got back to the Season One business of identifying the workplace struggles that everyone goes through. Ribs for everybody!

Office Recap, "Weight Loss"

You guys! The Office is back! Wiki-wiki-wiki-wha?
This, my friends, is how television is done. "Weight Loss" is by far the best season premiere of the show thus far. Maybe "The Dundies" runs a close second, but I'd still rank it second.

The episode kicks off straight into the opening credits--no cold open, which makes me sad. As opposed to the usual format of skipping straight to real time, this episode took us through 8 weeks of a glorious Scranton summer. Corporate is trying to get everyone to lose weight--the winning branch gets three five vacation days. Not a shabby reward!

Let's start with the new girl. Holly Flax, a major dork and girl after my own heart, is adjusting to her role. She teaches yoga, is not a lesbian, and has a sesame seed allergy and a butt that will not quit. (The bit with Oscar was probably the most awkward scene of the hour. Awkward and awesome!) She still understandably thinks Kevin is slow. When Angerela-ella-ella starts verbally abusing Kev, Holly jumps to the rescue and makes a complete fool of herself. It's actually quite endearing. Things don't go so well with the yoga instructor and there's a strong connection with Michael. Any couple who can rap together like those two deserve one another.

Oh, Michael. He's still pandering to Jan (who, thankfully, wasn't around much in this ep). Michael's going to be a good dad, but he deserves a wife and kids of his own. The Michael highlight was the Body Image Celebration, complete with inane pictures and Michael Klump-impersonation. Okay, so I get that he bought the sumo suit, but it also involved buying an entire business suit to go with it. At least he got the gender of the suit correct! His man-crush on Ryan hasn't diminished. "Go.....tee!" I loved the so-close attempt at wooing Holly. I know this never occurred to him, but seriously, you couldn't have asked her to go see Counting Crows with you?

Kelly and Darryl have still got it going on. I don't believe for one second that Ryan wants Kelly back, but of course she's going to fall for it. This is a girl who drank maple syrup, cayenne pepper, lemon juice, and water for three days straight. (The "cleanse diet" was a tidy jab at the Oprah fad from this last summer. Edit: Noelle corrected me and said that Beyonce did it years ago. That makes sense, given Kelly's affinity to all things Beyonce.) When Michael made Kelly stand up in the chair, it reminded me of this time in college when a professor made everyone say something nice about me. I don't really remember why, either. At first it was uncomfortable, but it is disappointing when it's over. "What else do you like about me?"

Angela Martin, with a routine like that, it's no wonder that you sleep so well at night. Of course she feels slightly guilty, but I can guarantee that it's all neatly rationalized in her mind. Andy really is kind to her (check out their fairy tale wedding website!), but only Dwight is man enough for her. I try not to think too much about Dwangela bow-chica-bow-wow, but it was pretty hot in this episode. How on earth will she ever decide? (Note: I have concocted rampant speculation on this subject, but The BFF reads this and she hates it when I speculate.) "Little Drummer Boy" is a call-back to both "The Pilot" and "A Benihana Christmas," so there has to be a hidden agenda. Andy's a Capella troupe, Here Comes Treble, is the collective best man. Individually, however, they have nicknames like Broccoli Rob, Jingle Jangle, and Sandwich. I wonder how many of them are still single...

Hoo boy. Jim and Pam. Where do I even begin? She's in New York; he's in Scranton. I like how she's the Hall RA and has to deal with issues like stolen soy milk, which is almost too realistic. It's hard on both of them (TWSS), but Pam at least has new challenges and friends. Mad Men's Rich Sommers makes a non-threatening appearance as a skilled artist of professor portraits. Jim doesn't actually do a whole lot in this episode, beside pledging to lose sixty-five pounds. (Side note: John Krasinski has lost lots of weight since the beginning. I prefer JKras with a little more meat on his, erm, bones.) Jim makes his trademark faces at the camera and that about covers it.

Oh yeah. I guess he also proposes to Pam. (!!!)
Holy heavens above, that was the most perfect engagement I could have imagined for the two. I was sure the writers would drag it out through November sweeps, but no, it happened during a summer rainstorm, at the Fairway Gas Station off Exit 17 where that soda once exploded on Jim. DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW LONG I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS? I cried and squee'd and essentially flipped out. And wow, talk about a passionate kiss! I love those crazy kids.

Utica barely beats out Scranton and Toby is injured in Costa Rica. Ha! The next episode airs on October 9th. I expect I'll be on a giddy JAM high for the next two weeks and that is what will carry me through 'til then. If I didn't know any better, I'd say #5 is shaping up to be a season of epic proportions.