Office Recap, "Golden Ticket"

"Where is fancy bred, in the heart or in the head?" 

I love Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory so much, you guys. I love Gene Wilder, I love Grandpa Joe, I even love Veruca Salt. ("I want a feast! I want a beannnnnn feast!") It is a perfect movie and there aren't very many of those in the world. In fact, I'd say it's the only movie that is actually better than the book and I adore Roald Dahl.

Michael has a stroke-of-genius marketing ploy to send out five golden discount tickets for Dunder Mifflin paper. He dresses up as Mr. Wonka himself and does a spotty Gene Wilder imitation. It's a day full of whimsy, excitement, and fantasy! Not a bad gimmick, but it might be a tad flawed. After showing him tucking the tickets into the paper boxes, he goes to the conference room to search for other "golden ticket ideas." (Band name!) Jim starts to pitch an idea, but it's too long. Heh. Andy throws out Golden Girls and Golden Grahams, neither of which Michael finds acceptable.

"I assume there's an accident indemnity clause."

Jim gets the first golden ticket call, from the Blue Cross. Not only did they find one golden ticket, but they found all five. (Wait, how did they find them so quickly? Did they have lines of factory workers opening the boxes?) Oscar confirms that they are indeed DM's largest client, which means they get 50% off for the next year. The phones keep ringing with David Wallace on the other line. Since Michael's not interested in taking the call, Pam relies on the list on excuses--civil rights rally, Obama fashion show (whatever that is), and trapped in an oil painting. Michael disposes of the costume in the dumpster and steals Andy's blazer for the rest of the day. In our second conference room meeting of the day, Oscar thinks they're all going to be fired because that's what shutting a branch means. Good call, O-dog. Yikes. Jim's got a mortage to pay. Carnations would have said the same thing as a house, but Creed begs to differ.

"Pampered and spoiled like a siamese cat / Blaming the kids is a lie and a shame"

I never realized this before, but Michael Scott is sort of like a perverse version of Gaius Baltar. Seriously, hear me out on this. So they're kind of idiots, but when it comes to saving their own skins, they'll do whatever it takes. Michael falters on whether it was an inside or outside agent and when he can't blame Jim, he lets Dwight take the fall. He calls Dwight in and they compare journal notes. Why keep a diary? Because it keeps secrets from his computer. I loved Dwight's TH about literally falling on his own sword, because even though you could totally see it coming, his delivery was great. Michael has nothing beyond his work, while Dwight has a beet farm and a growing B&B in the agro-tourism industry. This is true, but Michael's continual insistence that Dwight take the hit says a lot about how his character has and hasn't grown through the years. (Remember when he made Dwight pee for the drug test because he took a clove cigarette from the girl that looked like Alicia Keys? Good times.)

 "The suspense is terrible... I hope it'll last."

David Wallace comes in and you half-expect him to be all full of sturm and drang. Instead, he congratulates Dwight on a lifetime guarantee from the Blue Cross because they loved the promo so much. With a slight protest from Michael, Dwight accepts the honor because he believes in getting ahead for survival. Everyone congratulates Dwight on his success--Creed is oddly sincere, but Pam plays along just to goad Michael. They go in for a phone meeting with marketing and while Michael and Dwight argue about who has the best ideas (Toilet Buddy vs the Horse Boat), Wallace figures out what's going on and leaves once more. Okay, why does he have so much faith in these guys? He's certainly been working with them long enough to not take either of them seriously.

"A thing of beauty is a joy forever."

In a relatively minor B-plot, Kevin needs help with the woman from the Lonely Hearts Party from last week. Andy is all for back-handed compliments, Jim thinks you should joke with her but wait for like five years and then ambush her and tell her you love her, and Pam says he should show interest. Ah, sounds like Pam's been brushing up on her He's Just Not That Into You. There's bickering and a brilliant 3-way talking head about shame, rage, and hot people. The storyline concludes with Kevin meeting the woman in the parking lot (because...she works in the same building, right? Whatever, I thought it was weird.) He compliments her smile and says the two little words every woman wants to hear: "Niiiiiice....boobs." I think she'll stick around.


 "Look at me. I'm gonna be the first person in the world to be sent by television." 

 I enjoyed watching this episode more than any other in recent memory. I also loved the knock-knock joke bookends, Michael's Shoe-la-la business idea, and how he wants the credit without any of the blame. Classic episode with vintage Kaling writing.


"But Charlie, don't forget what happened to the man who suddenly got everything he he always wanted."
"What happened?"
"He lived happily ever after."