Classic cold-open, with the crew of Dunder Mifflin testing out the new speed limit radar. Dwight gets 13 miles per hour, but Michael runs an impossible 31 mph. The new Usain Bolt? Hardly, given that he reached the record with the help of a passing automobile.
Kevin goes for the new candy. Pam tells him to take it slow, since they're hot tamales. All in a rage, Andy enters the office because no one has responded to the wedding RSVP! What an outrage, considering the RSVP date was yesterday! And I'm positive that every one of their co-workers would have replied with their excuse for not attending were it not for the fact that it's been 17 days since the big reveal of Dwight and Angela's affair. Michael thinks that someone needs to tell Andy. Jim reasons he'd find out soon enough since their kids would have giant heads and beet-stained teeth. While discussing it in the breakroom, everyone decides that Angela should be the one to do that. Really, she should. If she didn't do such a whorish job of filling out forms, then we wouldn't even have this problem in the first place. P.S. Oscar, you didn't need to ask to know where they were doing it.
(Obligatory tux shot of the boys during the Golden Globes. No wins for The Office this year, but no hard feelings about it.)
A confession of "I'm not very articulate today" gets Michael in his car with the windows justbarely rolled down. (Michael, what days are you articulate, hmm?) Since we all know the man can't keep a secret to save his life, he accidentally lets slip that Dwight and Angela are sleeping together. And oh, the heartbreak, the confusion, the pacing! I felt so bad for my little Nard Dog. He honestly thought Angela loved him and only him.
Saint Bernard forces the terrible truth from his fiancee. Yeah, she was sleeping with Dwight just "a little bit." Dwight struts out of the kitchen looking for all the world like the volunteer sheriff's deputy he once was. In the back, you can faintly hear a western flute theme and see the tumbleweeds scatter past. Pistols at dawn? Try the parking lot at 4 P.M. High-five!
Routinely, Jim struggles with being the boss. He sticks around and collects all of Dwight's weaponry and really, that's all he can do. (I wonder if he found Mr. A. Knife from the filing cabinet?)
At the NYC office, David Wallace has a few questions for Michael. It's just tense enough to make you nervous because Michael's current track record with DM is on the rocks. Miracle of miracles, Scranton is doing the best of all the branches. You can tell from the expression on David's face that it's just as much of a shock to him as to us. So what's he doing right? "Don't ever do anything to anyone ever...." and he does the rest as an improversation. (Improv + Conversation) Bottom line, Scranton is a good branch because they have fun. It's crazy and dysfunctional, but it works for them. Wallace knows there's something to Michael's technique, but it's not something you can apply to the other branches. The subtle reference to the economy was very nicely done, by the way. (Did you catch how Michael's "need for tweed" joke was in reference to a question about self-assessment?)
Everyone watches from the window as Dwight and Andy have their show-down. Meredith likes having guys fight over her and Kelly knows that you have less options as you get older, so Ang shouldn't feel too special.
A note? What kind of duel is this? The kind where you can get run over by a silent Prius, apparently. Feeling rather foolish about it, Jim intervenes when Andy pulls out his real weapon. You see, Angela has slept with Andy twice. The pain and disbelief written across Dwight's face kind of breaks my heart all over again. Yeah, she was going to marry Andy, but she loved Dwight and that's all he wanted. He felt just as cheated as Andy which says everything about both of their characters. Angela spurned both of them and now neither of them wants her. One sailboat wedding cake is canceled and one personalized bobblehead is thrown in the trash. I get the feeling it's not entirely over yet, but it's nice to get some closure.
Other things we learned from this episode:
Michael won't be fired just yet.
Dwight keeps a cross-bow under that hideous couch in the foyer.
It is possible to have a great episode without much Jim/Pam interaction.
Interspersing introspective moments with great quotes makes for a good scene.
It's Hail Mary time.
Minor Spoiler Alert
Oh, and Amy Ryan is coming back! Maybe for the finale! WOOOOO!